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from 5 november i'm away for a bit over 2 weeks for work. if you want to know when i'm back writing, then

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Late at night. Just been back into work for an hour and a half trying to get stuff sorted for the trip starting tomorrow.

I'm not happy. I'm stressed. I've got a shitload of stuff I haven't done. I am ill-prepared for going away.

I need to get my head straight. About this job especially. About this job fullfuckingstop.

Y'know, a lot of it, like everything else, comes down to money. And it's not at all certain there'll be enough money to keep me employed, let alone do the things I want.

So I'm wondering about bailing now. Working to the end of the year or something and then leaving. The thought of staying home with Matthew and doing some part-time work from home is looking increasingly attractive.

And you know what might stop me? That I'll feel I've let people down, that I've taken the easy option, that I've given up.

I'll have a better idea after this trip, but I'm wondering if I need to think of me first.

Sorry this entry ain't on a good note. Thanks for reading. See you when I'm back.