recently on the turntable

harvester
me climb mountain

marvin gaye
let's get it on

the proclaimers
sunshine on leith

state of music radio in lower half of north island, new zealand

crap!!!!!
i drove 4 hours today, round trip, for a meeting - ya think i could get one good station?

It's 11.20pm. Late for me. I've finally gotten some time to write. I don't what I'll write, but I feel the need to write. Weird.

I go through my days thinking about my journal sometimes. "How will this work as an entry?" or "Is this what I'll write about?". Weird.

A couple things I like. That I feel a little bit part of a community of online journalists. That - hopeful smile - I've made contact with a few people I would like to stay in touch with. Both good.

Still thinking 'bout my entry of 23 July. Why the journal, who it's for, how I'll deal with some issues. But I don't haffta solve those things here and now. Let them mull. Things will out themselves if they need to be.

Thinking some good thoughts. Some calming thoughts. Jane Siberry has an album called When I was a Boy.   There's a track on it called Calling All Angels. I sing it to myself when I need courage. It works.

calling all angels, calling all angels
help me through this one
don't leave me alone

She sings the words better than I type them! If you do one thing after reading this, buy the album, listen to that track.

I don't know why I'm thinking of that song now.

Yes I do.

Just before I sat here and masturbated. It's a need sometimes. But sometimes I feel a self-disgust when I've finished.

I'm not hung up about the act or it's usefulness/beauty/joy/naturalness. But it seems, well, I guess a waste. For me right now. With a beautiful wife. Who I love.

The angels calm me. I just heard Matthew sigh on the baby monitor. Peace Michael. Smile.

You will be ok.

a ps for barbara
i promise i'm not going to get all
self-confessional in my journal.
honest. *smile*